As 2013 slowly comes to an end, I decided to use this post as a time to reflect on the things I’ve learned in the past year. Jim Rohn suggests writing down your thoughts and reflecting each night, but some days it’s hard enough for me to wrap my hair and remove my makeup let alone remember to get a pen and paper to reflect on my day! So here it goes:
Ideas are literally useless if you don’t take action to achieve them.
I know you may be tired of my go achieve your dreams you can do it posts, but it’s true! Last year around this time I didn’t have a blog. All I had was a thought. “Hey it would be cool if I started my own blog,” so I finally decided to take action and do it. I didn’t tell anyone though. I didn’t want to tell anyone until I was 90% finished with the blog. I’ve learned to not tell people what I’m doing until it’s either done or just about done. I didn’t want to be one of those people screaming “I’m about to start a blog and it’s about to be DOPE, all you other bloggers watch out because I’m in a league of my own and none of y’all are seeing me!” Then a few months later someone asks me how the blog is going and I haven’t even started it. Nope wouldn’t be me. I’ve seen it play out this way too many times, and it’s not a good look. The way I see it, time is going to pass by anyway so you might as well make the most of it and try to go after something you’ve been dreaming of doing.
Your friends and family aren’t always going to be there to motivate you, so you have to learn to motivate yourself.
I’ve learned that sometimes people can only be so happy for you. If it’s not their dream or passion you can’t force people to support and help you achieve your goal- because it’s YOUR dream. You can’t be mad at people either; it’s just the way it is. You have to learn to pat yourself on the back and tell yourself you’re doing a great job. Learn to be your own biggest supporter.
Being single is better than being in a toxic relationship.
I know I sound like an Instagram meme but it’s true! Never belittle yourself by settling into a relationship with someone who isn’t good for you just because you became tired of waiting. You, your best friend and your mom could see from a mile away that he/she was no good. You saw it just like you can see through a pair of cheap leggings, yet it still didn’t stop you. Oh yeah, while we’re on the topic of relationships, this year I also had to learn that when God’s trying to close a door do not reopen it, no matter how much Drake’s music makes you want to pick up the phone and dial the past!
We are all busy trying to figure out what we want in life, don’t take it personal.
Friends get busy and you aren’t always able to hang out and chat like you used to, but that’s life. It doesn’t mean they don’t care about you, it simply means we’re growing up and we’re all busy trying to get our life together. As we grow, so do our priorities; we can’t spend hours on aim like we used to! If you want to talk to someone, pick up the phone and call them. Don’t hold grudges. “Nope I’m always calling her I’m done, I’m just going to wait until she calls me.” Life at its longest is still short, just make the call.
Learn to skip a club/bar event or two, and your bank account will thank you later.
This one is pretty self-explanatory. It’s important to save your money. Build an emergency account, an investment account, and an account for your dreams/goals.
Sometimes being selfish is a good thing.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advising you to not help out the beggar on the corner, or not share your jeans with your sibling (insider with my sister, haha). What I am recommending is to be selfish with your time, and who you let into your life. I’ve learned that not everyone will add value to you, and the quicker you realize who is worth the effort is when you will begin to have a great circle of companions around you.
Judging only makes you look bad.
I have to admit, I’ve fallen victim to judging people quite a few times; it’s human nature! I’ve discovered that making assumptions about people and/or their situations only leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Have you ever judged someone for something, and then found yourself doing it not too long after that? Call it karma, call it irony, but it happens time and time again. Judging is caused by negative thoughts, which leads me to my next dogma.
Positive thoughts beget positive actions.
Your mind is powerful, and every thought has meaning. Once you master this, you will begin to realize that your thoughts impact your well-being, and life as a whole. Wasting your thoughts on negativity will only bring you down, and attract more negativity. I used to not be happy about my body, and those thoughts were affecting my attitude and outlook on life. As soon as I realized this, I started to take working out more seriously, and incorporated it into my lifestyle. Negative thoughts should only motivate you to turn them into positive ones. Be positive! And you will see a change in the way you live.
The grass isn’t always greener on the other side; focus on watering your own.
Comparing your life to others will get you nowhere. This is your story. You have the pen and paper and it’s up to you to write it. Everyone’s story will be different. Everyone will have a different path that they travel, and it doesn’t mean it is better or worse than yours. Just focus on getting yourself in order. It’s not a competition.
Speaking on getting yourself in order, always work on becoming a better you! Read lots of books. Workout and drink lots of water. Take a class. Learn something new. Travel if you can. Your laughter should outweigh your negative thoughts always. I’m sure after I finish this post I will think of 10 more things I’ve learned this year. Enough about what I’ve learned, what has 2013 taught you?